To Ed or Not to Ed: The Dream Machine

  The Beginning ''' ''' The sun over Peach Creek was hot and bright that fine summer morning. As usual all the neighborhood children were out and about, tending to their daily rituals. The foreign child who lived on a farm worked the soil. The popular jock rode around on his bike, showing off for the others. The younger children played with their toys on the sidewalk, caring only for their immediate amusement. Everything was right with this seemingly self-contained world of childhood innocence. And that’s when familiar visitors greet the children in the middle of their cult-de-sac.

Three young men, each of varying heights, had walked into the street. The shorter, squatter gentlemen strutting confidently at the front of the group was grinning deviously. The meek, tall, fair-complexioned boy with a hat followed not far behind, also smiling contently. The last one, a tall, burly boy followed in the back, his arms dangling behind him, giggling incessantly.

Upon seeing this motley crew, the others soon became weary. These were the Eds.

These neighborhood delinquents lived nearby, and nearly every day would attempt to scam them with fake products, attractions, and events that usually ended in disaster for everyone. Most plans backfired on the Eds. Eddy, the short confident leader, never thought any of his plans through and was too arrogant and self-centered to notice the flaws of his plans. Edd, the shy one with the hat, was friendly and righteous, but was too subservient to Eddy to raise his hand in protest. Ed, the large one, was wholly unintelligent and often ruined their scams with his absent-mindedness and clumsiness. Together they formed a trio that were inseparable and every time they appeared, something unexpected and destructive usually followed. The others glared at them as they approached, suspicious.

“What do YOU dorks want?” Asked the jock, adjusting his hat as he spoke.

“Oh…nothing…. only to show you the greatest device ever constructed by science! Show them, Sockhead!” He then gave the floor to Edd, who revealed a device covered in a sheet. He pulled the cover off to reveal a curious device, constructed with random junk and common scrap, Edd’s specialty. He was always designing Eddy’s harebrained contraptions.  The Dream Machine ''' ''' <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:4.8pt0in6pt;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">The device was constructed from a toaster with several flashing lights on top and a strange wheel attached to a long arm attached to the forehead that faces the wearer. It’s supposed purpose was about to be explained.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“What is it?” Replied a small meek boy in blue. His voice seemed to shiver with fright as he spoke, as if afraid of the unknown device.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Only the Ajax of scientific progress, Jimmy boy!” Eddy replied.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Apex Eddy, the APEX of scientific progress!” Edd corrected.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Shut up and just turn it on, smart guy.” Replied Eddy as he presented the item salesman-style. Ed just stood behind them both and laughed to himself, hardly able to contain his excitement.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Introducing, the Eddy-patented DREAM MACHINE! Give yourself the ability to live your dreams with this specifically tested, mind reading, and virtual reality headgear! 25 cents for 25 seconds! Who’s first?”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">Silence.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“It looks like an ordinary helmet to me,” replied the jock again. “How do we know you aren’t pulling another fast one on us? Does this thing even work?”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Of course it does, shovel chin.” Replied Eddy sarcastically. “Why don’t you see for yourself?” He held out his jar for collecting the payments and waved it in front of his face.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Fine. But if this thing is a rip-off, I’m pounding you dorks.”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Oh, don’t worry Kevin. It works.” Eddy turned and winked at Edd, who gave him a disapproving nod. Kevin deposited two quarters into the jar and sat down on a stool provided by Ed. The others looked on as Eddy lowered the helmet over Kevin’s head and flipped a switch on the back of the device.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">First, the helmet shook as it powered up. Mechanical noises of the gears turning and pistons pumping began to emanate from the inner workings of the device. The lights began to blink on and off now and the mechanical arm that held the wheel set itself into position right in front of Kevin’s eyes. Kevin looked into the spinning wheel and his eyes soon began to match the wheel’s pattern. His expression went blank and he focused only on the wheel, as if in a trance.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">Eddy spoke up: “Kevin, when I snap my fingers, you will live your wildest dream.” Eddy then snapped his fingers and Kevin immediately reacted.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">He jumped onto his bike and began to tear around the cult-de-sac multiple times, going faster and faster with each consecutive lap. After about half a minute, he skidded into the center, nearly running over a few people, leaped off the bike and acted as if he was accepting a trophy. Eddy snapped his fingers again. Kevin came to.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“That was amazing! I dreamt that I was a pro derby racer. Choice! That was worth every cent!”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“See? What did I tell you? So, who’s next?” Eddy asked, holding his jar up.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">The others went wild over the device and the next hour was spent profiting off of this marvelous invention. One child wished to be a fashion designer, another was a tree, another boy spent 50 seconds as a professional butcher and a little girl was a successful but overly demanding businesswoman. Ed even took the machine for a spin and ran around the block like a dog for 50 seconds.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">The sun was setting now and everyone left to go home for the night. The Eds gathered their things and began to walk home. They were ecstatic at their success.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Look at all these quarters! We’ll be eating jawbreakers for weeks!” Eddy exclaimed greedily.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“I’m in my happy place, double D!” Edd yelled, grabbing his friend and spinning him around.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“I’m very pleased to deem this venture a success, gentlemen. We have actually managed to create a device that is not only structurally and mechanically sound, but one that also poses no risk to anyone using it. We can get this patented!” Edd proclaimed, proud of his hard work finally paying off.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“We’re in the clear, boys!” Eddy added triumphantly. “Finally a scam doesn’t blow up in our faces! Tell you boys what, I’ll keep this dream machine at my house tonight, and we’ll get them all again tomorrow.”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Eddy, are you sure? You always entrust ME with the inventions. Wait, are you up to something Eddy?” Edd asked imposingly.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Me? Nah. I just want to keep it safe, I need it for…uh…inspiration for how we can improve on its profit possibilities. Yeah that’s it.” Eddy smiled awkwardly.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">“Fine with me, Eddy. But I’m warning you right now. That is a very sensitive device. Any degree of harmless misuse, and who knows what kind of trouble we can get ourselves into. It was programmed for scam purposes only. Got it Eddy?”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">Eddy looked at his friend and replied: “Of course Sockhead. I get it.”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin:12pt0in;line-height:15.75pt;background-position:initialinitial;background-repeat:initialinitial;"><span style="font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Helvetica;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:black;mso-themecolor:text1">He had the look of a madman. And his fingers were crossed.

The End
That night, Edd couldn't sleep. He thought he heard noises outside. Some seemed distant. Others seemed to be very close. He closed his blinds and tried to clear his mind. But there was something about that night that....didn't feel right. The noises ranged from distant murmurings to a low, dull humming sound.

He could finally feel the oncoming of sleeps cool caress, when all of sudden, he was jolted out of his bed by a loud banging coming from his window. He got up and opened the blind. What he saw terrified him.

It was Ed. He gazed upon his friend's face through his window. His eyes, once full of life and color were now plain white voids. He could see no emotion at all. His face was dull and sullen, and he lacked any notion of expression.

"Ed, are you alright?" Edd asked him.

He was given no reply. Ed just stood there, as if in a trance. He then walked away slowly, shambling slowly out of Edd's yard and back out into the street, disappearing into darkness. That's when Edd finally figured something out.

"Eddy."

Edd gathered a warm sweater, a flashlight and some tools and walked out into the night to find Eddy. The noises were louder once he was outside, and continued to intensify as he navigated the path to Eddy's house. Along the way, he could sense eyes watching him. Underneath the dull glow of the streetlights, he thought he could see figures following him, stalking him, but nobody appeared to be around.

He approached Eddy's house and looked into his window. Eddy wasn't there. He then asked himself: "Where else could he possibly be? If I find him misusing that machine, I'm not going to be very pleased with him. After all, it was an experimental prototype based on the hypnosis process we've already experimented with. It's a highly unstable device and I fear that Eddy can cause irreversible damage." He listened more closely to the noise. He followed the humming noise until it led him into the forest beyond the cult-de-sac.

The noise grew and grew as he walked deeper and deeper into the forest. It began to put strain on Edd's ears as he drew closer still to the source. He heard more murmuring in a small clearing and witnessed firsthand the source of the evening's strange occurrences.

All the other children, including Ed, were stalking about, zombie-like. Wandering in circles, drool dripping from their mouths, and eyes as pale as Ed's were. Eddy stood in the center of the clearing, laughing hysterically. Edd walked out to meet him and issued his disgust.

"There you are, Eddy! I trusted you with that device's safe keeping, and not only do you completely and totally lie to me, but you have also failed to heed my warning about the reckless abuse of the Dream Machine! Do you have any idea of what the ramifications are for this? Any at all?"

"What's that Double D? I can't hear you, I'm making too much money! We're going to be eating jawbreakers forever! I'm rich! I'm finally rich!" Eddy held out his jar again, this time filled to the brim with quarters, change, and dollar bills.

"You've been using the Dream Machine to hypnotize the others into gathering money for you?" Edd asked, distraught. He began to panic.

"Relax, Sockhead! I got it all figured out!" Eddy stated proudly. He addressed the others.

"At the snap of my fingers, you will all awake." He snapped his fingers. Nothing happened. The hypnotized children continued to shift about randomly.

"Why didn't it work?" Eddy asked aloud.

"I knew this would happen! I knew that prolonged and indefinite exposure to the Dream Machine would cause unexpected and dangerous hypnotic effects. You've turned everyone, including our friend, into mindless money zombies! Who knows how long this will last, they may never awake! I hope you're proud of yourself!" Edd shouted.

"There's gotta be another way", Eddy thought aloud. "I know, can't we take this headgear, slap it on somebody and  try to bring them back the same way I brought em' in?"

"You mean, reverse the process?" Edd caught on.

"You're the genius." Eddy said sarcastically. He grabbed the hypnotized Jimmy and set him down.

"Hurry up and put it back on him, Sockhead, he's squirming like a leech!"

Edd placed the helmet on Jimmy's head and adjusted the settings. He took his tools and adjusted the inner mechanism to spin the wheel the reverse direction. He started up the device.

The Dream Machine began to work as planned, vibrating and making noise as it activated. The wheel began to spin. Jimmy looked into the wheel and his eyes began to return to color.

"It's working!" Edd exclaimed.

"Am I a genius or what?" Eddy boasted.

But then something happened they didn't count on.

Jimmy began shaking uncontrollably as the machine seemed to go into overdrive. He fell over on the ground and continued to shake and writhe on the ground. The machine began to emit smoke and shake much more violently. Soon Jimmy's mouth began to foam and his eyes went white once more. Then he stopped moving.

"What the---?" Eddy tried to ask, but before he could finish, the machine continued to shake until it burst from the strain.

A large shock wave of blue energy shout of the wreckage and seemed to have an adverse effect on the children. They began to run around wildly, scream violently and riot uncontrollably. They soon turned their attention to the other Eds and began to run at them, screeching like creatures looking for a meal.

"What the heck!? Double D, what do we do?" Eddy asked, afraid.

"Run. We need to run." Edd replied.

They ran out of the clearing and through the thick forest. They could hear the children running behind them, getting closer and closer. They ran as hard as they could, but it was of no use. They tripped on a stray root and found themselves at the foot of a large tree. They were soon surrounded by the others, and hoisted up in the air by Ed's large, strong hands.

"I'm a minor, stop!" Eddy yelled, crying.

"Fate has conspired against us, Eddy." Edd replied. "It's time we reap what we have sown and pay for your lifetime of greed."

Loud screams were heard into the night.

The Aftermath
In the days that followed, the parents of Peach Creek reported their children as missing. Police officers and personal searched the area for days, and eventually found and rounded up the missing children. They were dirty and starved and irreversibly mentally damaged. The officials also recovered the wreckage of the Dream Machine, and sent it off to be investigated by professionals. They also found two bodies, but their identities were never made available to the public.

To this day, nobody speaks of the terrible tragedy, and many are still confused by the circumstances revolving around the disaster. What was the mysterious device they recovered? Did it have anything to do with their children's disappearance? They would take these questions to their graves.

Meanwhile, in a governmental facility, the US military began conducting tests.

Codenamed: Operation Peach Creek, volunteers were exposed to a larger version of the Dream Machine found at the site and were observed. It was hoped that the device could make people into better soldiers, and they were trying to develop a function that can cripple enemy forces in battle.

The results of the tests remain classified.